James’s Blog: A Conversation.

“I haven’t seen you at the shelter recently.”

“Yeah, well, I guess I don’t see much point these days.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t think I believe it any more. To be honest, I don’t really see how you can believe it.”

“What do you mean? You’ve given up your faith?”

“There’s a part of me, you know, that’s always suspected that it was nonsense, and it just got harder and harder to ignore. Take the resurrection. That’s ridiculous isn’t it?”

“No.”

“Come on. Even putting aside the ludicrous concept, you have to admit that it’s hardly a convincing story. Luke says one thing, Mark says something else. They’re all over the place.”

“That’s it? You’re throwing it all in for that?”

“You make it sound like it’s no big deal. Of course it’s a big deal. What am I supposed to believe if the Bible can’t even decide what it believes?”

“Look, you’ve got a shed, right?”

“A shed?”

“Yeah.”

“Yes, I’ve got a shed. So what?”

“What do you keep in your shed?”

“What has this got to do-“

“Just bear with me. You’ll see what I’m getting at.”

“Fine. My lawnmower. Some tools. I don’t know.”

“Right, let’s say someone broke into your shed and stole your lawnmower. Now let’s say you talk to a bunch of people who were walking past your house at the time, and one says he saw someone in your garden around lunchtime, and someone else says no, no, no, it was well after lunch-“

“Stop right there. I’ve heard that all before, the tired old excuse about eyewitness accounts.”

“That’s not my point. My point is that it doesn’t matter what the eyewitnesses say, you’re still not able to mow your lawn, are you? That’s the indisputable fact.”

“That’s probably the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever said.”

“So. It’s still true.”

“But it’s not enough.”

“OK, well, why have you stopped coming to the shelter?”

“I told you. I don’t believe it any more.”

“So you’ve stopped helping people? Sounds to me like not believing makes you a worse person.”

“Are you seriously telling me that I should go on believing a lie because it makes me a better person?”

“No, I’m telling you that maybe the thing that makes you a worse person must be the lie.”