I am in favour of throwaway encouragements. A throwaway encouragement is a kind word that you slip into conversation, and then move on. A throwaway encouragement is not given in response to someone fishing for compliments. Part of its magic comes from it being unexpected. Furthermore, it must not be dwelt upon – it is given in passing and then the conversation moves on. The hearer is not given a chance to respond. Finally, it must also be true. Insisting that a tone-deaf person is actually a fantastic singer is an unkindness, both to the recipient of the lie and the victims of their newly encouraged talent.
Throwaway encouragements are one way of fulfilling Paul’s injunction to be kind to one another. They can be an unexpected lift to someone’s day; but more than that, they can actually be the catalyst for a significant change in someone’s thinking. Often, we are blind to the things that are obvious to everyone around us, or get stuck in a pattern of seeing things a certain way, and a throwaway encouragement may be the crowbar that springs open a new door.
If you know someone quite well, I’m sure that you can think of a smash and grab positive to dump into their lap while you’re on your way somewhere else. I believe that you have the potential to make a real difference to the people who cross your path. Now, let’s talk about something else, shall we?